I can't cheer others

You say you can't cheer others. What is cheering ? How can someone change other's mood ?

One of my dear friend once told me that she doesn't know how to cheer up people. 'Mujey logo ko manana nahi ata.' If someone is sad or depressed around me then I just leave him/her alone.

This was one of the most unorthodox thing I had ever heard. Normally people try to console or help the depressed person so that he or she can sail over such grim. Other's try to share their sorrow and show that they are there for him/her.

She might sound unconventional or a cold hearted girl however she is not. She does not console anybody because she fears that she might worsen their mood rather then making them feel better. She just doesn't understand what to talk or say.

So she leaves that depressed people alone, thinking he/she will recover sooner without her. I believe, sometimes only an attempt of a friend gives boost to a person feeling low.

Sometimes even the simplest thing acts as healing agent. If you really care for that person you will be able to lighten their hearts. Here I m not talking about mood swings where sometimes people want to be alone.

My friend Just ask yourself one thing if you are depressed or you are feeling low will you not want your dearest friend to come up to you and cheer you up? Will you like them if they ignore you, if they stay unaffected or they leave you alone when you are sad or depressed.

If no, then try to cheer up people you care for. Because in life what you give is what you get.

My first crush

Friends, My first crush is different than most. Not because it’s more special but rather because its unique.

26 march 2008 1^st day of 11^th standard when a blue eyed girl walked into my life. 5.5 feet tall, vivid complexion, silky black hairs. Her Roll no. was 28, she wore a white skirt, white shirt with red hair band. It was her 1^st day of school, watching her walk to her seat is the most found memory I have of her, all the wilens, guitars started in my mind…. Needless to say I was spell bound by her beauty so much so that all my midterm results went for a toss. Maa ka ladla begard gaya tha… A glimpse of her made my day. Staring her was my hobby and following her was my passion. Initially I could never approach her, slowly we started talking and on a school trip I took her out for a dinner….  I thought Yes, but NO there I got to know that she is my best friend’s girlfriend.

My heart was broken. I asked god, why me god ? why me ? I liked one girl and you took her away even before giving me any chance. I was completely shattered; I acted like a piece of useless furniture.

Then Amir khan came to my rescue, he said life m 3 cheejo k beech nahi bhagne ka bus, train or chokiri, 1 gaye dusri ate hai , 2 gali teesri ate hai. So I gathered all the strength I had left, I focused my energy for my final term and I passed with flying colors.

Having a crush on someone is one the most exhilarating/ mesmerizing experience. Even though it may be silly and immature you get in touch with your emotions you never knew … you could feel. I guarantee you, you can never feel that by reading romantic novels or watching romantic movies. You can only feel it when your heart starts beating for someone else.

Think & Thrive

Think think think you should always be thinking, planning, focusing, aiming for the future endeavors. You should develop a habit of thinking specially between the age 22-29. Because thinking makes your vision clear and helps you in developing a thought process which helps to build an ideology and principle. Your actions are results of your thoughts and thoughts must be developed in order to implement what you desires. 

Take thinking as an exercise and I ll say it is the most important exercise of your life because only thinking will craft your future, only then you will be able to understand your options and grab the opportunities. 

Only then you will not regret wherever you will be in future.

Thinking is a continuous process you can not say my exams are over I ll wait for my results and then plan for my future. No my friend, no matter the result negative or positive you should not stop thinking because thinking is a habit and only at this faze of your life you can inculcate this habit which will became your USP for life. I know plans will change, you will face setbacks but don't get disappointed, there is no living soul on earth who has not faced failure in his life. We are mortals we can not pen down our future however we can try. We can replan, rethink and strive again.

I am not saying to always keep thinking about the future and forget the present and stop having fun. I am a party lover, masti khor myself. What i intend to say is that at this stage of your life your career, your ambition should be at the driving seat and amusement should be at back seat. 

Friends we all get one life so we should thrive for whatever we desire. In the end we should not repent that we are not left with any options.

- inspired by my friend Gaurav Singh

Why teddy bear

I always used to think that only kids play with teddy bears. But man !!  girls keep surprising me. Guys you won't believe middle aged women loves teddy specially when it is gifted by their boyfriends. And i am talking about all kinds of girls loving, caring, angry, tom boy, every girl likes that   thing. They love  doing stuff like keeping their teddies clean, hugging & kissing and even sleeping with teddies. Each girl has a gang of teddies of all sizes and colors. They all have different names like tedda, gollu, honey.

But Why why girls ? What's in the teddy ? Don't you think you are too old for playing with teddies ? After knowing this i felt even getting ready in 2 hrs for school is justified.

I was keen to find the answer to this teddy, most of my friends could not say anything they just like it there is no reason to it.
Finally I asked the same question to my sister she just asked me one question why do guys love Ferrari ? And There I had my answer. Sis you rock.

Free Advice

India is home for 120 million people, we come from different backgrounds, caste, religion, region, community however we all have one thing in common, we all are experts in giving free advises.

It does not matter whether we know that person or not we like to give our expert opinions to them. People in India like to lecture and go on and on for things about which they have no fucking idea. They don't know the situation in which he or she is, neither they know the background of the problem but then to miraculously they will come up with solutions and not just one but MANY.

Funny part is people giving expert advices don't even follow their own advise when they get into the same situation.
Like its said - "Its always convenient to say than do".

I know every Indian has being on both receiving as well as advising end. People please understand "free ka gyan kisi ko acha nahi lagta". Kindly understand the situation and then speak. I understand that we definitely have good intentions, we want to help others, what i mean is we should be aware of all facts before advising someone .

Also we should never provide free advises to a stranger, colleague or a person with whom we are not that jelled up. Frequently unasked unnecessary advices only bring down our own image in front of that person.

Lets aspire to be the one others look up for valuable advices rather then being a person who speaks a lot and people don't give a dam about whatever he says.

So, No more free advices. Speak wisely. Act promptly.

My Last Supper in Mumbai

I consider myself to be a grown up man. Someone who knows the reality of the world. Someone who can put his emotions aside and judge the situation according to facts and circumstances. But sometimes believing in fantasy is better than being realistic.

I am doing CA internship in Mumbai which is going to end soon and I will be heading back home, my native town. I have a bunch of very special people whom I ll miss a lot. I too like others have made promises with my friends to meet once every year, to go on a vacation with them. However I know all these vows are fantasies, this is the last time after which I won't be seeing most of my bestest best buddies again. Such thoughts are noxious knowing you can't have better friends like you have now, knowing some part of you dies when you part with them.

I wish I could be optimistic like others. Like People who live in present and believes in their future. That way I could also live these last moments, enjoy my last supper rather than thinking about the coming tragedy.

To my friends reading this, I love you all from the bottom of my heart. The time we spend together is the best time of my life. 

No matter the time or distance between us you will stay in my heart forever.

YES you may go

No matter how modern we become, no matter how much western culture we adopt no matter the era, there will always be a difference between a girl and a boy.

Parents are always more worried about safety of a girl child rather than a boy. Girls are always under the radar of the parents.

To go anywhere mall, club, party etc boys just need to inform their parents that they are going out, sometimes not even that. Whereas girls have to take proper permission, have to convince each member of her family to go anywhere, explain each and every detail of the place she is going, report back at time, call them when she reaches or leaves the place she is visiting. 

And if its an Outstation Trip begging starts a MONTH ago...

Asking - "Mom can I go GOA with my friends for 2 days" 

Pleading - " Please dad just this once, all my best friends are going"

Persuade - " You the best mom in the world, please... convince dad na."

Crying - "I never ask anything from you still you say no. That's not fare"

Striking a Deal - "I'll do anything dad, whatever you say"

Question-Answer session - how many boys and girls are going? Where will you stay ? What do your friends do ? Where do they live ?

Assuring - "I’ll be safe, I'll give all my friends numbers also"

Promise - "I'll call you 4 times in a day and will never miss your call"

Holy crap!!! All this melodrama for 2 days trip, all this for a YES. Girls freedom are totally at the mercy of their families as there are so many restrictions and conditions like there has to be one other girl with you all the time, I want her parents number, report everything every place you go on the call, stay away from drinking alcohol, etc. 
Let me tell you, even after putting so much effort the success rate of a YES is only 10%.

Though it sounds extremely hard but usually isn’t. Because girls are super smart species. They take the permission from their parents but change the reason of their outing...

Dating – Going out with Dimple (friend) & office colleagues.

Night Out– I am staying at dimple’s home for group studies.

Party – I will be late today have lots of work at office.

These clever foxes LIE to their parents on frequent basis. Though it’s wrong but I feel it’s sometimes necessary. Because nobody is wrong on their end, parents are right in ensuring the security of their girl and she is also right in wanting to enjoy her life to the fullest. At a stage in life it becomes hard to convince parents and at the same time it’s also hard to resist the temptation.

 This is life nothing is wrong or right. Its the way you look at it.

When do we fail

What is failure ?

Aamir khan , Bill gates, Mark zukenburg are drop outs from colleges, Bharat Ratan master blaster sachin tendulkar failed in 10th class. Do we call them failures!! Why Not ? Why are they any different from other failures. Why do millions dream to be like these failures ?

The question that comes to my mind is when do we fail ?  Thomas Edison invented light bulb after 2000 trials when asked why did he fail 2000 times, he gave a wonderful reply, he said I didn't fail I just found 2000 ways of not lighting a bulb. what I mean to say is we fail when our self consciousness accepts defeat. We all want to pass, we all want rank, we all want to be renounced.  We pray for it, we work hard for clearing exams but why don't we ever ask ourselves "Do I deserve it" " have I done justice to my studies to pass the exams by just studying for clearing exams"

I am a CA student and have met many other students who JUST want to clear exams like me but just one who says 'what is the value of my CA degree if I can't do hedging taught in subject financial management, if I can't do capital structuring, consult people on mergers and acquisitions'. He is the only one who admitted that he deserves to flank in exams. he wants to fails, so that he could do things right next time.

Difference between them and most of us is very simple these people plan for long term and we short term. My aim is to become a CA no plans after that whereas their aim is to grasp knowledge so that it could help them in long term no matter the attempt they take to become CA.

I feel People really fail in their life when they don't introspect themselves and get themselves into wrong streams, when they stop reinventing themselves, when they stop enjoying their work.
Marks can't determine anyones fate, no doubt they are the indicators of knowledge however when a Grade F student considers this F as an stepping stone and takes its positively than they are not a failure, someday with this positive attitude they will achieve more than any other grade A student just like then Aamir, bill gates and many more.

Why don't I fight for things that matter me most

Why do I let things go. Why do i leave things on fate. Why do I think other than marks I don't have to work hard for anything else and everything should come naturally to me otherwise it would be fake. Why cant I make an effort to keep, please, to win over that person who matter a great deal in my life.

I m a person of belief that all things frdship, relationship, love should come naturally to a person. Making someone like u or falling in love with you is betrayal to them and yr ownself becoz u are not like that person who act in that certain way to please the other sex.

Their might be 2 reasons to such belief either you are lazy or you believe in such thing as fate.
Well both the reasons apply to me.

Sadly acting like this, I let go so many dear frds, family and loveones. Each time when someone exits my life I think only if I could have fought for them, if I had demonstrated my feelings towards them, I had showed my intend to be their forever, if only I had made them believe, they could be with me.

Long time has passed some decisions have been good some regretting. However even after so many experiences I still introspect myself, I try to understand where should I fight and where should I let go.

I understand I m human, bond to take wrong decisions but I still want to understand why don't I do what I say and stand for.why do I let the time slip away. Why do I accept defeat easily under harsh circumstanes.

One thing I have learned from my frds and my journey of Mumbai is until u try you can't reach your destiny. Unthing is free in this world, you have to ask for it and work hard for it, to truly have it. Therefore I have promised myself that I will be an active person and wil make every effort to keep that jem of person with me. Also I will not blame the fate for taking that love from my life. I myself is responsible my inactiveness and decisions. From now on I make my own fate or will die trying.

Pursuit of happiness

Somebody is good in academic, somebody in sports, someone is a good orator, others good as leader, care taker, family guy, party maniac, friend.

Everyone is good in something or the other but only few are able to maintain balance between family, friends, studies and curriculum.

Its harder than one think it is to persue desires, to work enormously hard to reach the peak and to give time to loveones, friends and family. Only thinking about managing all this makes me insane. Time is too less to give time to everyone.
One has to set priorities according to the situation, which is a hard exercise in itself as doing so one has to give up being with near and dear ones or give up on ones dreams. Its hard to strike a balance between all.

Sometimes you take that hard decision, sometimes life makes that choice for u.
We all want everything in life, happiness success and fun with no pain, sacrifices. We all know that's not how it works " kuch pane k liya kuch khona padhta hai". Something that we should understand is "humko Kya pana hai" what do we ultimately want from life.

We all face that question at some juncture of our life.
Marks/scores, striving to become the best, working hard in office to acheive excellence get appreciation, recognition is what everyone likes and Desires. However even having that you can be unhappy.

Indra noori being PepsiCo CEO for years recently admitted that balancing her family with work is very hard, she said she had to on many occasions miss her daughters school functions for work. Her job has robbed her personal life, her family time.

Success has no meaning if it at the cost of Loosing friends, getting divorce, ignoring parents. This victory, this success, this trump is worthless without loveones. In trying to achieve our endeavours we missing out other flavours that life has to offer to us or the other way round in enjoying the life we r endangering our future.

That's why as balance diet is important for healthy life a balance life is essential for blissful life. And one should including me rather than making excuses try to strike that balance between work, studies, personal and social life for a happy and contended life.